Thinking of Joining Ulumau? by Laura Dierenfield, Class VII
Consider it carefully and be prepared to lose it all, in a good way.
I promised the Executive Committee I would share my Ulumau experience in the hopes it would help others decide if this was the right fit for them. So if you are considering joining Ulumau, I hope these words do offer some guidance for you.
It’s cold and windy in Waimea tonight as I am packing for tomorrow’s final Ulumau Closing Retreat and Graduation for Class VII of 2010-2011, Ulu Mālamalama, at the Mauna Lani Bay Hotel and Bungalows.
Tomorrow I will gather with a group of extremely talented and thoughtful leaders on one of the greatest places on earth, our classroom and our teacher of these past twelve months, Hawaiʻi Island. Many will receive graduation certificates, but a few of us won’t; I’ll be one of them. And while one might say the official reason is because I lost out on so many of the monthly Ulumau classes, I know now it’s because I didn’t lose something: myself.
I feel as if I am one of the lucky ones to have found a career, indeed a calling, to pursue solutions that connect us all on a more human scale. That passion was a big reason why I chose to miss so many of the Ulumau classes this past year. But what may be the biggest lesson of my Ulumau experience was realizing, tonight as I’m trying to pick out the right black pants to wear to the ceremony tomorrow, that I have a lot more to learn when it comes to connecting with other people.
A few days ago, I read a piece written by New York Times columnist David Brooks. He was talking about the dominant theme of graduation speeches, this being the season of “graduations”. Brooks observed that most of today’s young graduates are told to, “Follow your passion, chart your own course, march to the beat of your own drummer, follow your dreams and find yourself.” But as Brooks so eloquently pointed out, rarely in life do we form a self, then go live a life. Rather, life, as Brooks put it, “comes to a point only in those moments when the self dissolves into some task. The purpose in life is not to find yourself. It’s to lose yourself.”
So now I think I know why Rod Hinman, one of two principal facilitators of our class, would look at me with such disappointment, and I think a little sadness, whenever I would tell him that I was leaving early or going to be late to class. Having graduated from Ulumau himself, Rod understood what it meant to lose yourself in the tasks of life; tasks done with others and for others; tasks, commitments and rules that indirectly (because there is no other way) lead to a life of fulfillment. He and his co-facilitator, Ulumau alumna Margaret Horwatt, had made a selfless commitment to us this past year, along with many other past graduates and esteemed current island leaders, all for the purpose of making our Ulumau experience a meaningful one. Perhaps Rod’s disappointment might be because he knew I was missing out on a reward that can only be earned by following the same process he and others had gone through the last 8 years of this unique leadership program.
While I don’t regret the decisions I made that caused me to miss classes, the truth is that by missing the classes I was ignoring the rules that mercifully suppress ourselves in the shared pursuit of excellence.
The commitments and tasks of Ulumau, including the opening retreat, the readings, the monthly classes, mid-year reflection and group projects, gave us, the students of Class VII – and may give you, if you so choose to apply and are accepted into the program – a chance to let ourselves dissolve into something much greater than any one of us could ever do alone.
If I could do it again, I would take those tasks and commitments more seriously.
Fortunately, the Executive Committee will give me and others a chance to make up the classes that we missed. And while I am very grateful for this opportunity, I know it won’t be quite the same sense of fulfillment as my fellow students of Class VII surely must feel tonight on the eve of their graduation. And that makes them great leaders; great servant leaders.
So, prospective Ulumau student, consider the commitments and tasks of Ulumau seriously. The rules, the reading, the retreats are all there for a good reason. They are there to give you a chance to be the best leader you can be for this incredible island. Don’t apply if you don’t think you can lose yourself in the Ulumau process. But don’t be afraid to try, either. You may surprise even yourself with what can be accomplished, together.
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